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Not Sure

I'm really not sure if I want to continue with this journal. I got an iPad and I bought this app called Day One. I like it because I can write in it and no one will see it. I feel too exposed with this one. It's weird. I used to want to have a public journal, where strangers could read it and comment. Maybe make new friends from it. I have made some friends or friended people I already knew.

Same with Twitter. I have an account, but really don't use it much. My mom and sister have me linked on it. I also like it to keep up with ADOT, so I know what traffic is like. I'm thinking of creating a whole new Twitter if I keep updating this LJ.

I really don't even post on Facebook much anymore.

I guess with the "trouble" I got myself into with Facebook months ago, it drove the point home that I need to be careful what I put out there. I don't want to lose my job over something I say online.

It's just hard to let go of something I've spend years (off and on) building up. Like the fanlistings. I still haven't removed those from my profile. And the mood themes and profile pictures I've saved over the years.

I'm 37 years old. Maybe it's time I trash some of the things I've been holding onto since my 20s.

Joy In The Little Victories

It's so nice to look at my credit card statements and see a zero balance. I feel so good paying off the bills.

And that's the reason for my title for this entry.

So here's an update on my life since I wrote last.

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This Morning

Yeah, so, when I checked my Photobucket this morning, it was working again. Ugh. So I fixed my mood theme. I'm using "The Craft" movie mood theme in honor of Halloween. I'm also adding some Halloween and Thanksgiving icons.

I'm still thinking about the Fanlistings stuff. At least I still have it. But I'm still thinking maybe I could just delete them. From the sites I saw last night, some fanlistings haven't updated in a year. The owners are slacking on it too.

This morning I started watching "The Craft". Then I went to get some blood counts done at an Urgent Care type place. Nothing's wrong, just some counts for my insurance. If you get it done and enter your numbers into the website, you get a discount on your insurance. Uh, yeah!

So now I'm going to change some stuff around in my bedroom. I'm thinking of turning the Bears game on. Not sure if I want to.

I Was Gonna...

So I was going to work on updating this journal today, maybe add a new mood theme. Well, I messed around with the settings on my Photobucket account and lost all my pictures I had there. All of my mood theme files and all of my fanlisting pictures are gone. I've been working on moving my current mood theme to the LJ Scrapbook feature. It's a pain in the ass!

I'm starting to think maybe it was a good thing. I really am too old for the fanlisting thing. I started to reupload those pictures but I may just delete them all. So if any fanlisting owners check my link...sorry. I don't know, it's cute and fun. I like having the pictures on my profile. But then I'm like I'm almost 37 years old. Do I really need to keep up with this anymore?!

Speaking of letting things go, I recently took down my old Backstreet Boys fan fiction stories. I also took down the ones I used to host. It's been three years since I wrote anything. It was time. I deleted my email for them too. No warning, no nothing, I just did it. Again, I'm getting too old to be holding on to that stuff. I have everything saved on my external hard drive, so it's there if I ever want to revisit that time in my life.

I'm up late for me. Best I try to get to bed and try not to think about this LJ stuff!

One More Week!

I just finished watching Authors Anonymous and it made me feel like writing. I still have a story in me, it's just a hard one to get out. I should probably just write scenes and then put it all together later. Maybe now that I cut Cable TV out, it's something I should work on. Yes I did it. I cancelled my cable. I still have internet, of course. Cannot live without internet! But I'll be saving $100 a month just by cutting out TV. I still have Apple TV, Netflix, and Hulu Plus, so I'm not hurting for anything to watch.

But yeah maybe it's time to start writing again. It's hard to do because it's a subject matter that kinda hard for me to think about. It's about someone relapsing back into cancer and getting a bone marrow transplant. Facing that fear of mine. But I'm writing it as a Backstreet Boys fan fiction because it's so easy to use them and not create those characters from scratch. It's hard enough to create the main character and not have it be completely me, you know? I don't want to be a direct Mary Sue. I want to post it anonymously as I made myself a pariah in that fan fic community. Plus I was known for a certain genre of story and this won't have much, if any, of that.

One more week until I start training for Chat Team! My promotion actually starts this week because they had to do it at the start of the pay period. I'm really going to miss my team though.

I wasn't planning on going anywhere today. But last night the charger for my Air Mac (laptop) broke and I had to get a new one. So off I went to the Apple Store. Then I went to the Cheesecake Factory and got a lemonade. Best lemonade ever! Came home and instead of getting take out, I made some Mexican rice and honey bbq chicken bites here. Facetimed with Mom, then Jenny and the kiddos. I miss those faces! They were being crazy and I got to see the clouds moving in. Jealous that they got a thunderstorm. Now I'm just bumming, watching movies and stuff.

I really would like to try to write.


Steel Magnolias (2012): Movie Review

Movie Info on IMDB

I also watched the remake that Lifetime did of "Steel Magnolias" on Netflix this afternoon. Ok why?! I grew up on the 1989 version and it's one of my favorite movies. Just the other day, my sister and another friend were quoting lines on Facebook. While I admire the fact that they wanted to do it with an all black cast, this was a remake that shouldn't have been made. Yes the classic lines were there, but it felt wrong coming from different voices. I just didn't feel it.

But surprisingly, I got teary eyed during Shelby's illness and her death scene. And when M'Lynn goes to her grandson. I never get emotional during those scenes, but in this version I did. So I guess this one packs more of an emotional punch in that way.

I didn't mean to compare the two versions, but if you love the 1989 version, skip this one. Just rewatch Sally Field.

12 Years A Slave: Movie Review

Movie Info From IMDB.

It took awhile to work up to watch this movie. I knew the subject matter would be hard to watch. I was right it was. But I wanted to watch the movie that had won the Oscar for Best Picture. And I wanted to see Lupita Nyong'o's performance.

I must admit, it was a bit slow and like I said some parts were hard to watch, so I was doing my nails while I had the movie on. But I got the story. What this man lived through, did to survive and get back to his family. This part of history is swept under the rug. Yes you study slavery in history class, but you never hear how free blacks were tricked into traveling to a certain point south and then kidnapped and sold into slavery. What we're taught in school leads you to believe people were born into it. I hope this is being taught now. So that part of the movie pissed me off. And it's true which makes it worse.

But the movie itself is good. It has it quiet moments and some shots left me confused, like what was the point of that shot? But the ending was satisfying. I just wish the family knew how he died. It's sad that this great man's death is a mystery.

All in all, it's worth the 2 hours. The performances are wonderful and you really feel for the characters. And Lupita totally earned that Oscar.

Some Updates and New Developments

Dear Diary, I need to write in you more...lol.

The update...I got Chat Team! More people are on it than originally thought, but I'm one of two from my training class who got the promotion! I'm excited! Plus a few people who were mentors during training are going to be on chat too, so I'm looking forward to working with them. I'm going to miss my team I'm working with now as we've gotten closer. So I'm just enjoying the next few weeks and doing a good job with my current job.

Mom and Dad came out to visit me March 26 to April 4. I took a couple days off work and spent some time with them. We went to the Phoenix Art Museum and saw the Hollywood Costume exhibit. It was so cool to see all those costumes from my favorite movies! It was shocking how tiny the women's waists are and how short the men's clothes seemed to be. We also ate a lot haha. I took them to Bobby Q's and they loved it! If you're ever in Phoenix, go to Bobby Q's and get the Q rolls. Dad really liked the beer I had and I'm sure got some when he went home haha. I'm sad they're gone but I'm glad I have my place back. They stayed here, a few nights, sleeping on the air mattress. Then when I went to work the next week, they stayed at a hotel across the street, staying here again the last night. I miss them.

I talked to Mom earlier and helped her find ways to free up space on her computer. Just frustrating because I can't go over there and just do it for her haha.

I got Apple TV and love it! I love watching movies I have on the computer on my TV. After season finales, I'm thinking of cancelling the cable part of my bill. I'd save $80 a month doing that.

I caved and turned on my AC today. It's been in the low 90s all week, but I'm at work during the hottest part of the day. So being at home...yeah it was quite warm in here.

I did a lot of running around today. I went to The Body Shop and got more tea tree face stuff. Also got raspberry shower gel...smells so good! Then I went to Dillards and got some more PJ pants and tank tops. It's an outlet store, so I got 3 pairs of pants and 6 tank tops for like $40! Got gas in the car and got the dust off at the car wash. Did my usual grocery shopping and came home. I was tired and hungry! So I've just been bummin' the rest of the day.

I'm still thinking of writing movie and book reviews here. Again just need to make the time to write them!

All I want to do tomorrow is get my hair cut and do my nails. Oh and read by the pool! So I have no excuse for not writing tomorrow haha.

I'm getting sleepy and my bed is sounding good. I'm listening to "Divergent" by Veronica Roth and reading "The Lost Symbol" by Dan Brown.

Still No Call

Well, I guess my former co worker doesn't need my help that bad. If she can't take the time to call and let me know what happened, I'm not going to worry about writing anything.

Instead, I'm going to concentrate on my own work and finding out if I'm going to be on Chat.

Speaking of work, most of the country sprung ahead today. Not Arizona! My time didn't change, but I still took a nap this afternoon haha. But because my work is based on central time, my hours change tomorrow. It was 1:30pm to 10:00pm, but now with the time change, my new hours are 12:30pm to 9pm. So just need to remember to leave an hour earlier than I'm used to. I've been working on getting up an hour earlier too.

I bought Catching Fire on Blu Ray today and spent the afternoon watching all the special features. Then I watched Gravity tonight. Pretty intense! And not for those who get motion sick easily. The Phantom is on cable right now lol. Cheesy ass movie but I still like it. I have it on DVD...why do you do that?! I can watch it whenever I want but will watch it from the middle when it's on cable.

I was looking through book blogs last night. I remember I used to try to get one going. It's a lot of work and time to get one going and to keep up with it. Plus I'm a slow reader nowadays. When I do write book reviews, I post them on Goodreads. I was thinking maybe I'd try to write them on here too. Maybe movie reviews too? I'm no critic, but I try to put thought into what I write. I love movies and just want to share my opinion on what I like and don't like. Think anyone would care?! Probably not, but it could be fun to try.

Time to get into bed with my laptop and another movie. Finish Warm Bodies or watch a cheesy made for TV movie I've Been Waiting For You?! Guess I'll let you know tomorrow!

Silver Lining

I just finished watching "Silver Linings Playbook"...finally haha! Really good movie. I have so many movies that I haven't watched yet, but I'm slowly working my way through them.

It's been a long week and I'm just glad to have my "two day vacation". I spent today cleaning and doing some reorganizing. I also am working on making meals out of what I have in the freezer, so I can get that cleaned out as well. Not really cleaning but, you know, just eating things up around the house before I buy anymore or get take out.

I had the realization that the next time I clean (in two weeks) will be right before my parents come visit me. Yikes lol. Nah just kidding. I'm excited about them coming. I talk to them most every day and Facetime on weekends, but it's not the same as actually being there or here. I took a couple of days off work and I've been tasked with thinking of things to do. I've come up with one so far. The Phoenix Art Museum is going to have a Hollywood Costume and Red Carpet thing, I think we're going to go see all the dresses and costumes from movies. And I know I'm going to take them to dinner at Bobby Q's. Just thinking about those Q Rolls makes me drool! Aside from that, I'm clueless haha. I'd just be happy hanging out at the pool or something with Mom and Dad.

I had my interview for the Chat team on Thursday. Yes I was chosen to be interviewed! My supervisor told me I was the only person from Wave 3 (the last class to come out of training) that was interviewed. Everyone else has been there longer. I felt it went well and my sup told me he heard it went well too! There was a writing exercise and a short interview. The writing part had questions like an interview, you just had to write it out. Because that's the job, typing answers to questions and communicating through written words, instead of spoken words. The third part was the most fun and most nerve wracking haha. It was a simulated chat through the IM system. I had two going at once, then dropped to one then a third person IMed me, making it two chats again. It was challenging to keep it straight, but fun as well. I know it makes no sense that it was fun, but it was for me.

I'm going to find out early next week if I'm in or not. I'm not going to be disappointed if I'm not. It's a complete win win for me. Because I have a great team, supervisor, and I love my hours. So it's not like I'm out something if I'm not chosen. If anything this might set me up to get into the chat team in the next round. The first round will work out the kinks and I'll have some more time to learn and work on my problem areas.

I was a lil moody at the beginning of the week. A former coworker has asked me to write something for her about why I left Walgreens. I'm not sure what happened with her, but it's bad enough it's going through a lawyer. She's supposed to call me this weekend and tell me what's going on. So we'll see. It just got me thinking of what it was like working there and it brought back old feelings of anger and feeling bad about myself. I'm trying to flip it in my head that writing it out will be cathartic. I hope so because when I quit, I forgot everything I learned there job wise. And I'm so happy with where I am now that I don't want to remember where I was a year ago. My dad did say something to me...something like He's (meaning the pharmacy boss from hell) is still there, he's still stuck there and you're not. I don't remember the whole context but it's true. They are still there and I'm not. I moved on...to bigger and better things. I'm working for a company that values me and what I can do. I've only been doing my job two months now and I'm already being considered for a promotion. Hashtag suck it Walgreens haha.

I'm going to end it there on that note. It's a beautiful night in Phoenix. A nice breeze is coming in through my patio windows. I'm starting to yawn, so I'm going to head to bed with my iPod or another movie. Not sure which yet.